New Attitude

So I said I might bring fibromyalgia back to the blog once in a while, well here it is. Yes I still have FM, yes I still have pain & fatigue and other symptoms but a lot has changed at the same time.
After not finding a medication that will work for me, just the occasional hydrocodone, which really doesn't relieve the FM pain just the other pains from arthritis, etc., I was partaking in many support groups both online and a local one here in Charlotte. I even started several groups myself, and my blog was solely about FM. I thought this is great to be able to share with other people who actually understand what I am going through and whom I can talk to. I thought this was very therapeutic until I noticed that my symptoms seemed to be getting progressively worse. I just blamed the FM as a progressive disease, which the doctors say is not. Well I decided to take a break from all of my FM groups and I stopped going to my local support group and something amazing happened--- I started feeling better! I have always believed that you take in the energy of what surrounds you, and if I am grouped with a bunch of people that are in constant misery, then I am going to feel it too, also being the somewhat empath that I am, I do feel what others feel. Oh I'm not cured, in fact I am in extreme pain right now as I type this, but yet I feel great! I know this can not make sense, but it does to me. I hate the pain, but I accept it and I have to live with it and I'm ok with that.
I haven't given up on my fibro friends who need my support, for them I will always be here, and I will always advocate for fibromyalgia awareness. I still drop in on my online groups about once a month to check in and say hi because I am still one of them-I just choose not to write about it everyday and about how life sucks and how I wish I would die-- No- I don't feel that way. Life is good! I am happy and fortunate to have what I have in this life and path that has been chosen for me.
The mind is amazing- creative visualization works- you have the power to control how you choose to feel.
BTW- I am also seeing a reflexologist who might have something to do with this change too but I think I need to take the credit for my mindset, because only I can control that.
Always smile, think positive, spread that positive energy to those around you- it is amazing what can happen.

Being Strong

Another day of awful symptoms. 100% chance of rain is probably a huge contributor. It just has not been a good month for me. This entire week has been nothing but "Red" days and I have become completely frustrated. I finally had to tell my Fab 5 friends that I could not go out Saturday for our Girl's Day Out. The plan is to go to IKEA and unfortunately I have to accept that I am physically not capable of enduring that and that really pains me. This is another one of those times that reminds me that I am disabled and I don't like it. I am not going to feel sorry for myself however because that really gets you nowhere. Plus John is home sick today-he thinks he might have the flu and he feels terrible. I really want to be there for him and do what I have to, to take care of him like he always takes care of me. I must put my fibromyalgia aside and be strong for him, although I will feel the effects of it later.

I can't really put my fibro aside, I just , for one, day have to ignore myself and how I feel, no matter how bad, so that I can do something for someone else. Everyone always says how you have to take care of yourself first, well this is different. This is my husband who has taken care of me everyday that he is capable and today I do what I must for him. I will pay the price without hesitation.